A Modest Proposal Re: Jobs Bill

Now that President Obama’s State of the Union speech is supposed to center on income inequality, the radical right is out big time complaining that people really don’t want to work; they just want to get their check from the government; that helping them find work just makes them lazier; that helping them feed their children just makes them lazier; etc., etc., etc.  And according to former Republican Presidential candidate, Mitt Romney, this is a sizeable number of people.  47% of the entire population.  Since it is impossible to have a decent discussion with people who suffer from the above mind-set, I have a proposal that will prove them to be right!  After all, with their logic they should be absolutely positive that my proposal will fail, and, along with that, they can then prove that President Obama is absolutely wrong as well.

And my proposal?  Pass the minimum wage increase proposal and extend unemployment benefits for the over 1.5 million people who lost them this year.  Then, pass the President’s Jobs Bill to repair the infrastructure deficits in our roads, bridges, schools, public buildings, burying power lines so people aren’t out of power during bad storms, for starters.  Since these deficits are all over the United States, funding this Jobs Bill will provide work for people all over the country.  Not only will this proposal provide for construction jobs, it will require a network of business offices all over the country to keep track, in detail, of everything that is going on with these repair of deficits projects.  These offices will be providing jobs for women, who everyone knows can only do office work, if at all.  And, if women are actually working for Uncle Sugar, as Mike Huckabee calls Uncle Sam, this will cut down on women’s need for birth control because the women at the office will have to control their libidos, which, according to Huckabee, are now out of control as a result of Uncle Sugar providing free birth control pills.

 Why would this prove the radical right to be right?  Because no one will show up to apply for the jobs!  They will all be sitting at home waiting for their unemployment checks, SNAP cards, Social Security, Medicaid reimbursements, or whatever, to come from the government.  With no one lining up for the government jobs, this will also prove that President Obama’s “socialist” ideas are wrong as well.  Just think?  Two ways to take down progressives with one swat.  It will take some funding to open the employment offices, but that should be of no account, since the radical right had no problem with spending some $24B to shut down the government last year, and opening these offices will not cost nearly that much.  And for men, think of all of those women out there with uncontrolled libidos, no jobs and birth control funded by someone else.  Christmas every day!

I think this is a terrific idea, and I certainly hope the radical right will support it.