Enjoy! Just Not Yet!!

Today is the anniversary of our beloved adopted granddaughter Martha’s death.  When she died I, nor anyone else in our family, had ever heard of Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD).  Although we were smart enough not to go down the dead end road of, “If only we had done this or that”, we still questioned what had caused her, at the age of 11 ½ years of age, to take her own life.

I was at the time a county supervisor, and our public health director talked me into going to Chicago for a workshop some months after Martha’s death.  That is where I first heard the term, learned what pre-natal alcohol and illicit drug use can do to the developing fetal brain, and what we as a county might be able to do. And why Martha simply could not make rational decisions.  Over the next several years our county staff, with me standing on the sidelines cheering them on, and with the help of our county admin officer and a fellow supervisor who went on to become our state district assemblyman, began what I was pleased to be named, Martha’s Place.

Martha’s Place is a diagnostic and treatment center for children 0-5 years of age who exhibit at-risk behavior problems including but not limited to FASD.  Since Martha’s Place opened its doors on January 7, 2007, my last day in office, it has triaged over 1,000 children.  Children are diagnosed for medical problems by a pediatrician, for psychological problems by a trained and licensed psychologist, and either then referred out into the community for treatment if that is available, or the child receives treatment at Martha’s Place.  Martha’s Place also counsels the care giver of the children who are being treated at Martha’s Place.  These caregivers can be anyone from foster parents, relatives, or the adoptive or natural parents of the children.

Particularly in our county which has become a prime vineyard and wine center, wine is a very socially acceptable drink, and there are numerous wine clubs where people get together at various wineries to taste, and just enjoy the good times.  And all of this is really great, and much to be delighted in.

However, and I really emphasize this point, if any woman who is pregnant and is a member of one of these fun groups, she should not drink the wine!  Some women metabolize the alcohol very nicely, but the problem is that you don’t know if you are one of these women or not until after the damaged baby is born!  In fact, whenever you see a pregnant woman who has a drink in her hand, be terribly rude and tell her not to drink it!  This is one of those times when rudeness is not only acceptable, but practically mandatory. 

Also, this is not being against drinking alcohol!  It is only about drinking alcohol if you are pregnant.  A motto that we should all carry with us at all times is: If you are pregnant, please let that wine age an extra 9 months.  Then, if not nursing, enjoy it to the fullest, knowing that you have protected that little stinky, noisy, demanding bundle of joy to the fullest. 

Remember: Let that wine age an extra 9 months, at least.  Then enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!!!